Book Bling-Elizabeth Alsobrooks

WEWRIWA:#8Sunday

8/29/2015

Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors, the weekly hop for everyone who loves to write! Sign up below with your name, blog and email and share an 8 to 10 sentence snippet of your writing on Sunday. Your post needs to be live between 12:00 noon on Saturday 08/29/15 and 9:00 AM on Sunday 08/30/15. Visit other participants on the list and read, critique, and comment on their 8sunday posts.

WIP: Daughter of Ancients, a New Adult Supernatural Romance.

SETUP:

What I'm working on is weaving supernatural abilities into the text in such a way that they seem natural to the world/character I am developing, while making sure the reader understands what is happening. I realize that happens over time and with consistency, but it is especially difficult in the beginning. Below is a scene in which I am revealing the characters' telepathic abilities while building suspense and weaving in information necessary to the plot development.

EXCERPT:

Instinct drove me, and I pushed gently into his thoughts.

Danger. Not what he appears. This man is a threat to Stefanie. I must protect her, at all costs, Hunter was thinking.

Surprised, I turned to consider Abasi, my lifelong friend, more seriously.

He must not-- What the hell just happened?

My quick access to Abasi’s thoughts had been cut off as though guillotined. Hunter. Again. I glanced at Hunter and caught him with his amiable facade down for a moment. Though he didn’t look at Abasi with hatred, his look was calculating and guarded.

12 Comments

Ed Hoornaert link

8/29/2015 02:04:03 pm

Sounds like she got a valuable bit of knowledge from this early mind-reading foray--much more interesting than if he was thinking about laundry or how his socks were itching.

Elizabeth Alsobrooks

8/30/2015 03:37:39 am

Glad to keep you amused, Ed.

Amy Braun link

8/30/2015 01:54:40 am

Oooo, very interesting... I wonder why his thoughts were like that.

Elizabeth Alsobrooks

8/30/2015 03:38:12 am

Thanks, Amy.

J. Rose Allister link

8/30/2015 06:02:16 am

Hm, a lot going on in those minds--even more intriguing than what she was able to pick up telepathically was what she couldn't. Nice job leaving me wanting more.

Elizabeth Alsobrooks

8/30/2015 08:14:31 am

Thanks, J. Rose Allister!

Veronica Scott link

8/30/2015 06:22:06 am

Interesting snippet, not sure what's going to happen next, which is good as far as keeping us reading along!

I have trouble with this font, the I looks like a very curly J on my screen but I persist because it's an interesting story you have going...

Elizabeth Alsobrooks

8/30/2015 08:15:55 am

Thanks, Veronica. Thanks for the font insight. Interesting. I've had many compliments on it, but this is the first complaint. I will have to examine that.